That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
