Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
