Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize