I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I have fence marks all over my body
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize