we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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