my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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