I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
