FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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