His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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