Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Oh god it's open bar.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
