OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I see more hoeing in ur future
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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