I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
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