my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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