garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
