The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
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