you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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