nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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