May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
