people are starting to question the shark bite story
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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