Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
