if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
