i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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