How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
