We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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