Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I need to sanitize my soul.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
