cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
honey bunches of taint.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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