Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Randomize
