Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
