...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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