I want to have your abortion
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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