Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
