Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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