real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
