The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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