hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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