Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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