Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
