How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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