Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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