Dual....:-)
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
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I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
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Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
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