You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Randomize
