I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
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