So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
