I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Your cock deserves a montage
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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