He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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