it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Is it penis luge time yet?
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
