we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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