you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
