that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
They are going to name an STD after you.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
