real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
farters have to be the big spoon...
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
